All hail the first of September in olde Nagoyaland, and despite the persistent 33C and sunshine, there is a distinct autumnal vibe in the air.
This morning the sidewalks were buzzing with throngs of uniformed students on their way to first day of classes, after having roughly five weeks off. It's certainly not the type of summer vacation that I had as a kid growing up in Vancouver, where we were blissfully left to our own devices from the third week of June, until the Tuesday after Labour Day. Sleeping in, hanging out, doing odd jobs for pocket money, causing trouble; being a general nuisance....the best of times. Not here on The Island of Gilligans. Oh, no. In fact, it's not uncommon to see the local kids all suited up and off to school anyways (vacation be damned), to partake in some manner of obligatory 'club activity'. Apparently these 'clubs' aren't really optional (the students are forced to choose and join one - or have one chosen FOR them), and require that their members (willing or otherwise) dedicate an inordinate amount of their 'free' time to 'the group'. This year, at the local park, day in, day out, at 7:30 am, six days a week, a group of around ten 15 or 16 year old old boys would turn up in their track and field jerseys, like clockwork. Rain or shine. They'd group together...rarely talking or laughing (like you'd expect of kids their age on vacation) and all sit in a circle on the pavement, doing sets of prolonged stretching exercises...after which they'd alternately sprint short distances or stoically jog (silently) in a group around the park until around 9:30, at which point they'd just sort of vanish, as if on cue. What really struck me about this 'club' was how utterly joyless they were. No goofing off or shenanigans. All poker faces. I mean, come on. These are young guys. I don't get it. It was like watching a bunch of animated, flat grey cardboard cut-outs show up day after day, and methodically go through the same scripted routine, without any variation, then leave.
I wonder what they got out of the experience? A sense of belonging?
Of course, after the obligatory 'group' time is spent on these club activities, there is the matter of summer homework. The very concept would have caused rioting back in my school days. Pure outrage. The only people that had any summer academic activities were the sad sacks that got stuck going to 'summer school' - an unfortunate experience that I had to endure when I was 14, because my marks in Algebra 9 were so pathetic. Summer school in Vancouver consisted of a half day of instruction, from 8:30 am to 12:00 noon, for the duration of July, at whichever school in your given district they'd decided to hold said 'festivities'. The classes were full of the types that you would expect. Truants, reprobates and dumbasses. At least there was generally no homework assigned, and attendance basically assured you a minimum passing grade. Needless to say, I made sure not to fail Algebra again.
Over here, on the last day of classes in July, everyone is given a text/activity book, with around 100 pages of activities, projects and assignments that must be completed and turned in on the first day of classes. These vary from reading and writing exercises, to math problems, and research or even 'art' projects...many of which get shuffled on to the parents to complete at the last minute, because junior didn't have his shit together, and spent his 20 minutes of daily free time playing Pokemon Go! or passed out from exhaustion. I once asked what would happen if an individual just sort of decided to say, "fuck it", and blow it off. I was met with a blank, incredulous look. Apparently, this is 'unheard of'. One does not simply, 'blow-off' the summer homework. It just doesn't happen. I actually feel kind of sorry for these kids. It's like they're beaten before they even get out of the gates. By 11 or 12 years old, they're so conditioned for 'the group' (whichever one that might be), that they lack any ability to make a judgement call or decision independently. Instead, it's waffle...defer...seek consensus, or stonewall by 'teeth sucking'....a thoroughly reprehensible and annoying habit that persists for their entire adult lives. Whenever the local J-natives are at a loss for an answer, or put in a corner and have to respond to a question that they can't or don't want to, the sucking starts. They suck their teeth like champions. It goes like this. Grit your teeth. Make sure your lips aren't closed. OK? Now suck wind and spittle through them. Deeply. As hard as you can. Listen to that. Gross, eh? Make sure everyone else can hear it, too. It's like the J-natives distress call. "Oh...Mr. Kato doesn't want to answer a question...he's being put on the spot"...(SuuuuuucK!). I have to severely curb my slap reflex whenever they start in with this. This unfortunate habit seems to kick in sometime during their high school experience; more commonly with the guys, than girls. They're busy cultivating their own crop of annoying inflections.
The kindergarten kids that I teach are, for the most part, not yet indoctrinated...not to the full extent, anyways. At least I haven't caught anyone sucking their teeth. I'm sure it's going to happen eventually. When they get into the grinder of elementary school at age 7, the boom gradually comes down . By the time they're spit out into the school uniform machine of junior high at age 11, they're pretty much reconditioned. A fresh batch of tooth-sucking, joyless, pie-eyed, waffling dullards.
So..."Viva September!". Here's to another few million identical wheel cogs for a wonky, obsolete old machine that desperately needs to be brought into the 21st century.
Let the celebrations begin.
